Maya is examining Danny, the teenaged vampire who attacked her the first night in the refuge. She's discovered Danny is Dec's little brother and the progression of his illness is the reason Dec is so gung ho about finding a cure. (For clarity's sake, Katie is Dec's main lieutenant.)
Beads of blood swelled in the grooves, and purple and blue bruises were already joining the green marks from yesterday and before. Danny’s whimpers of pain tore through Maya’s defenses, making her wince with him, and she reached down to her bag and some bandages, holding the chains away from the worst of the injuries near his neck as she did so.
The sudden sting of his fangs sinking into her wrist made her cry out loud. Maya yanked against the attack, feeling her flesh rip as she broke away, the blood spurting from the exposed vein. Danny grinned at her with a sickening crimson leer, his head falling back onto the pillow, but it was wiped from his face when Katie’s fist connected with his jaw.
“I told you not to move the chains,” Katie said as Maya stumbled away from the bed.
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24 comments:
Could picture every bit of it. Excellent description in a tense scene.
Such smooth and detailed writing. Can see this.
Wow, what a tense situation! I like that Maya is sensitive to her attacker's pain. In these sentences, I think Katie scares me more than Danny...
WOW...that was an intense snippet. Awesome description, I could see the scene so easily. Loved it.
Great six. You keep me coming back for more.
Wonderful six! I can't wait to read more!
That will definitely bring the lesson home. Intense six, Vivien. :)
Beautifully written - very tense six!! Thank God Katie was there!
I like Katie, lol. She sounds like my kind of girl. Nice 6, Viv!
Great six. Lesson learned: Don't do nice things for vampires ;)LOL!
wow, intense scene! Great vivid detail...
I never know whether to be revolted by Vamps or to pity them. This is a nice piece - gives me the option to do both at the same time.
LOL! I'm sorry, but Elin's comment (which is just above what I'm writing at this moment) cracked me up--I feel the same way!! However, I will say, that this scene really drew me in. I like the suspense and danger that overshadows the action in this scene. Great six!!
Oops! Great scene, stupid mistake. :)
A disease that makes vampires more vicious? Interesting.
Very intense. Made me uncomfortable in a good way - terrific snippet!
You put right in there. Great work.
WOW! This may be your visceral Six yet. Scintillating stuff!
Love your strong characters. Katie is simply amazing. :)
Wow, so strong. I loved "sickening crimson leer" - great six!
Wonderful six! I'd hate to be the doctor to a vampire...
Your writing is always so beautifully vivid, and this is no exception. LOVE the crimson leer!
Really beautiful details here. Enough to paint a scene without being overwhelming.
And hey, who doesn't love a lady punching the leer right off someone's face?
Well I guess she'll have learned her lesson this time. Lovely grim details.
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