Sunday, April 29, 2012

Six Sentence Sunday

Welcome to my SSS! For the months of March and April, I'm highlighting sentences from the very first novel I had published, a het vampire erotic romance called Chains of Jericho. It was the very first book I had final in EPIC's ebook awards (then called the EPPIE), and since I had two final this year, I figured this was a good time to share the one that started it all.

Dec has just learned that the nightmare he's been trying to control isn't over, and come back to his room and Maya wracked with too many feelings. A kiss has exploded into the potential for more.

Her breathing was starting to even out. “So why do you need it now?”

If he’d been more eloquent, this would’ve been the time to tell her how much she’d brought into his life over the past few months, how watching her and learning about her had shown him the costs of being driven toward a single purpose, how lonely it could be when one closed the door to anything but their goal. He would’ve told her about Tasha, and about how he’d failed, and then begged her not to give up on him just because he’d made this fatal mistake. He would’ve been able to put voice to the burgeoning feelings he had for this beautiful woman, in spite of the fact that she was human, or maybe because of it, and how she constantly amazed him with her willingness to look above and beyond.

But Dec didn’t possess a silver tongue, and he had to settle for a simple, “Because you were looking for me.”


To check out all the other six sentence contributions, head over to the official website.

19 comments:

kerriannecoombes said...

So much in this six! Brilliant.

Kate said...

Oh, I love how he thinks he can't be eloquent, yet his internal narrative is so clear. Lovely six!

sue said...

Perhaps she will feel all that he is thinking. just gorgeous

Veronica Scott said...

Gosh, SO much bottled up inside him! I hope she can help him, really like these characters. Terrific snippet!

Corinne Davies said...

It's the quiet ones that always have the most to say ;) I hope Dec manages to put all that into words one day :)

Charmaine Gordon said...

Lovely. No one could have said it better.

K.E. Saxon said...

Dec is in such torment. I am totally in his thrall. Great Six, Vivien!!!!

Cara Bristol said...

So like a man to keep his words concise. Enjoyed your six.

Sue Ann Bowling said...

Nice conflict between thought and speech.

Monica Enderle Pierce said...

Love how you turned this in the end.

diannehartsock said...

Beautifully written, as always. So much depth of feeling in that simple line at the end. Maybe Dec can tell her all that one day.

wildcats wife said...

Nice narrative and then boom at the end with, "because Dec didn't have a silver tongue" -- good explanation! Sounds like Dec is in need of a little "tongue and cheek."

Jessica Subject said...

A very emotional six. Well done! :)

angelaquarles.com said...

Great peek into his internal thoughts and feelings and how he looks on himself as well... It's like the iceberg, he's only showing a tip with his response, but there's so much more beneath...

melissamackinnon said...

A great narrative from a quiet man... so he thinks. A great and powerful six!

melyndaprice said...

Great six! Loved his narrative, and then to give such a simple answer... Great complexity of his character.

Denny S. Bryce said...

Whoa! Excellent six. And I especially like the last line.

Siobhan Muir / Meg Palevich said...

So much emotion packed into so few sentences. Well done, Vivien. :)

Jess Schira said...

I don't need to read anymore to know that I really like him. Nice 6.